it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
