Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
