R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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