what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
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