He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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