I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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