Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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