I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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