Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
well you can't waste a boner
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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