you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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