How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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