is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
