Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
