I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
