I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
