how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize