Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
