I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
