my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
