turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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