That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I wear drunk well.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
