don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize