I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
