yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
