Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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