i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
