Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
