he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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