can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize