i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
