Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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