I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
