He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
