You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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