ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize