It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
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