I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
