nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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