Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
