Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
