You were right. It hurts to walk today.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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