isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
