she smelled like a LAN party
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
