So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
