Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
We left an ass print on the piano.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
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