I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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