we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Randomize
