I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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