i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
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