i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize